It's in the journey...

A friend of mine brought a song to my attention tonight that really made me think. 

Throughout this past year, I've wanted things to go back to the way they used to be... before my life seemed to crumble and fall apart right before my eyes.  If I had just done something differently, maybe it wouldn't have happened.  After I finally let that go and realized that there was absolutely nothing that I could have done about it... I started asking God to change my life.  To make it all better, to make it all go away so that I could be happy again.  I even became frustrated more than once because nothing I did seemed to make any difference.  Nothing seemed to help the healing process.

But, you know... this song really made me think.  I am a stone, my life is not perfect.  Although I have been hurt beyond belief and feel as if I'm damaged, I am a smooth stone in my God's hands.  As much as I hate that it is taking longer than I would like, time brings change and change takes time.  My heart will heal in due time, as will my life.  In the meantime, I just need to be patient and focus on God's love for me.  He has a plan for me... and I have always believed that.  This was a lesson in my life that I apparently needed to learn, and if that's so, then I should be grateful. Who knows?  Perhaps He has something far more wonderful planned just for me!

You never know why you go through certain things in life... whatever you've been through, God has a plan and a way for you.  You just need to believe in Him.  He never promised that the path would be easy, but He did promise that He would carry you through.

 

Lyrics provided by STlyrics.com

Rolling River God -- Nichole Nordeman 

Rolling river God
Little stones are smooth
Only once the water passes through
So, I am a stone
Rough and grainy still
Trying to reconcile this river's chill
But when I close my eyes
And feel You rushing by
I know that time brings change
And change takes time
And when the sunset comes
My prayer would be this one
That You might pick me up
And notice that I am
Just a little smoother in Your hand
Sometimes raging wild
Sometimes swollen high
Never have I known this river dry
The deepest part of You
Is where I want to stay
And feel the sharpest edges wash away

You're Not Alone

As most of you know, I'm going through a fairly nasty divorce as of yet... not by choice, by need.  Some things you just don't deserve.  That is the one thing I've clung to the entire time: even if he had wanted to try again, I don't deserve to be with someone who treats me the way he does.

That being said, I've been clinging to music as well to get me through the dark spots of my life.  I believe what they say now... music is therapy and does the soul good.  Especially when it seems like the singers can convey your feelings better than you can.  But songs can actually transmit messages to you, as well. 

This is one that I've gotten recently... and I found it when I felt I was at my lowest.

I searched for love, when the night came and it closed in
I was alone, but you found me where I was hiding
And now I'll never ever be the same
It was the sweetest voice that called my name sayin'

You're not alone, for I am here
Let me wipe away your every fear
My love, I've never left your side,
I have seen you through your darkest nights
And I'm the one who's loved you all your life
All of your life

You cry yourself to sleep cause the hurt is real
And the pain cuts deep, all hope seems lost,
With heartache your closest friend and everyone else long gone
You've had to face the music on your own
But there is a sweeter song that calls you home, sayin'

You're not alone, for I am here
Let me wipe away your every tear
My love, I've never left your side
I have seen you through your darkest nights 

And I'm the one who's loved you all your life

All your life

Faithful and true, forever
Oh, my love will carry you


You're not alone, for I, I am here
Let me wipe away your every fear
Oh yeah, My love, I've never left your side
I have seen you through your darkest nights
Your darkest nights
And I'm the one Who's loved you all your life
All of your life


[You're Not Alone-- Meredith Andrews]


Gotta say that this song has reached out to me.  Just remember that whatever you're going through, He's always there for you.